Perusing the net I came across some dude talking about the law of attraction and how it seems to “work” for some people and not so much for others. Then he said something to the effect that the law is always working but that WE put a roadblock up and stop whatever it is we’re trying to manifest. Come again? You mean I’m the one doing this?
Hold up… We’ve all heard of self sabotage, right? That’s when we ourselves overthink too much or we do something that makes sure whatever our goal was gets all mucked up and we end up with nothing. Then we say “See!! I KNEW it wouldn’t work!” Self fulfilling prophesy…. yes, I’m sure you know about those…
But that’s not what this dude was talking about… He was saying these roadblocks are caused by our own selves in an unconscious level. And once we remove said blocks, then everything will fall into place. Sounds easy, right? Here… let me pull out my map to the self conscious unconscious self… Hmm… I seem to have misplaced it…
So what are we supposed to do? Those of us that seem to have misplaced our maps?? I tell you… we go around in circles and then eventually give up, right? No. Yeah, you heard me. I said “no.” Ready for an adventure? It’s a rough one but so worth it!
Go back to your childhood… back as far as you can remember, then try to remember before that… If you’re anything like me, this is what you are more than likely to find as you try doing this:
That’s right… darkness and you sitting around going OK Cnith… I can’t see a damn thing!! You’ve lost your mind. I have, but bear with me for a moment. Sit in the dark for a bit… take a spell… and if it doesn’t freak you out (as it does me) see if you can enjoy it.
This is where your journey begins. Back before you can remember. Now think about the “odd” things in your life. For me, the dark has always freaked me out. I absolutely HATE pitch darkness and silence. I hate getting my hand dirty and sticky. Why is that odd? Because as a little girl I didn’t care. But… somewhere along the line someone uploaded a new program into my message banks (aka subconsciousness.) It said, “If your hands get dirty, you will be hit beyond belief. Stop doing that!” As a grown up, I get rid of it as fast as I can as if I am being persecuted and it’s a crime against nature or god knows… I am expecting that hit to come at ANY moment…
Why is that important? Because until that dude said ANYTHING, I thought it was weird that I hated the feeling of sticky dirty fingers. Why weird? Well, considering I work with my hands all the time and love to garden, you can see how things get a bit… odd… But now I realise that no, the reason I don’t like it has nothing to do with being sanitary. It has to do with a) bodily harm (abuse?) as a child and b)you’re a bad person because you allow to get your fingers/hands dirty. You’re not good enough to be anything worth caring about. (Why else would they hit me so badly?)
The thunder and lightning issue comes from being locked in the room at a very young age during thunderstorms because the idiots I was forced to live with, the ones who were supposed to protect me, didn’t want me running into their room for protection. What WAS I thinking?! What a foolish, dumb child was I to think I was going to get protection and love from those things who are wastes of human beings? In any case, I’m a little bitter… The message there was “You’re not good enough to love or be protected. You’re a bad child. You don’t deserve protection or love.” A theme which was recurrent in my life until recently… When I discovered this insanity, the constant record playing broken CD in my head, I pushed the stop button and guess what happened? I ended up learning that I DO deserve love and protection. I was doing things the hard way, thinking I had to do everything on my own. I don’t. It’s OK to ask for help and it’s OK to let someone love and protect you.
So back to you… are you ready for the journey? I left out the gruesome details… the denial, the almost crying (crying for some of you?), and the agony and defeated feelings… I also left out the empowerment because how do you describe that? How do you describe that feeling of a load off your back, off your shoulders, off your soul? That feeling of ahhhhhh… like a long hard earned bubble bath you only see in commercials and movies? And that yahoo!!! moment where things finally make sense?!
I’ll leave that journey up to you… What did that say? A journey of a million steps always start out with just one…? Something like that…. Doesn’t matter. My picture and quote say different and that’s OK. The point is, you just have to do it… if ANYTHING to let go of the past and set yourself on a good path and discover things you didn’t know before. The roadblocks are there for a reason… they were to protect you…at least until you were strong enough to deal with them. And that time has come, my friends. That time is NOW. I know you’re strong enough. I can see what you have done, even if I don’t know you. You’re sitting there, reading this. That’s proof enough for me. HUGS to you all!!